I didn’t think I had enough time to write a blog before mother’s day but an email from an old friend has given me the motivation to get it done.
My friend’s email was emailed to all the mothers in my first mothers group. This group of young mums having their first babes began about 2 ½ years ago (although it still feels like yesterday).
We were a mixture of Australian and English mums who all happened to be living and working in Dubai, in the Middle East and all happened to give birth around the same time. We became each others lifeline, each others community and each others family. Some of us didn’t get the birth that we wanted and some of us couldn’t breastfed, some of us had babies that didn’t sleep and others that slept too much, some of us went back to work and some of us stayed at home but we all went through it together.
I was privileged enough to teach some of the mums in our mothers group baby massage. We would meet on a weekly basis in our high rise apartment away form the dust and humidity and for 1 hour spend time being completely connected to our babies and supported by each other. We also took our babes to swimming lessons and Boogie Babes and met for coffee and lunch – how easy it was with one baby! We shielded our babes away from the hands of well meaning people eager to touch a ‘western’ baby and also happy to hand them over to waitresses keen to hold them while we had our dinner. How lucky we were to be able to expose our children to a range of different cultures.
Some of us have gone on to have our second child now and this was the reason my friend felt compelled to write an email to us all. She has since moved to China and recently had her second child and who like me found this to be another new learning experience and causes you to reflect on life when your first was still a baby. We have all been able to keep in contact via Facebook and see each others updates on status’ about the children reaching milestones and photos from family holidays. But nothing compares with been able to meet in the person; to be able to watch and learn from each other, to have each other to help you to your car when they can see your struggling, to hold your baby while you go for a quick dash to the toilet, to tell you where the cheapest nappies are that week, to give tips on managing a long haul flight and how to find the right nanny.
Being connected to other mothers is important. It validates your fears and concerns, which is so important, and finding the right mothers group that you connect with is a very special experience.
The birth of my second child was no less special than my first but nothing compares with the rawness and the newness of having your first baby. It took me along time to get over leaving my first mothers group. They were what kept me going and created wonderful memories of the birth of my first child.
So whether this is your first mother’s day or your fifth, I wish you a day of reflection, relaxation and rest. Enjoy the toast or pancakes (if your lucky in bed); enjoy the homemade card and extra cuddles and kisses. I also hope that you have had an experience of a mothers group like mine. Or that you get to be part of an activity or group that encourages you to connect with other woman.
To my entire Dubai mother’s group friends, Happy Mothers Day and thank you. You are my inspiration for what I am doing now and the reason I am writing this blog. I still miss you all x
Happy Mothers Day to all.